So far so good sort of.
So I’ve been keeping up with my exercise, which is definitely good.
I’ve been keeping up with my intermittent fasting shooting for 18:6 averaging 19:5 so that’s good.
What’s not so good is my nutrition.
It’s hard to over eat when you only have a small window to eat. I’m still not eating the RIGHT things though.
I haven’t eaten doritos or anything like that, but I eat too many carbs and not enough protein. I’ve tried before to add more protein to my diet and I stick to it like everything else for a little while then fall off again.
I feel like this blog has become more about my struggles and failures than my successes.
The scale keeps bouncing around as do my measurements and I know that even though I’ve been consistent for 3 weeks it’ll take a while to see results.
Lately I’ve been looking at my progress from 2020 when I weighed the least I’ve weighed in my adult life. I lost all that progress and gained nearly 40lbs in a year.
I think for me I do want to be more healthy and have clothes fit better but I don’t hate my body. It’s silly to think you need to hate your body to change it but it might help.
I am a bit disappointed in the loss of thinness in my face but other than that it’s not always something I think about.
Maybe I should start posting pictures of myself each week and updating here a bit more. Might be embarrassing might be motivating. Who knows until I try it?
What do you think? Would it be helpful? Would you do it?
I know I get some interaction on this blog so maybe I’ll post up progress pics and weekly weight if even one or two people think it’s a good idea. Heck I may do it even if people don’t interact at all.
This blog is after all for me but I do appreciate those that have read and followed along with my journey. I hope it’s been an interesting read for you.
Back at it! (Finally)
Well it took me long enough but I’ve started a steady workout routine again!
Should it have taken me so long between starting this blog and now? Nope.
That’s life though right? So many people want to get fit, they make commitments to themselves or their friends or strangers on the internet. With all the best intentions but it doesn’t make it any easier to actually follow through.
I used to look at stories of other people, they all had these moments where they’ve said “enough is enough I’m really doing it now” and they just stuck with it.
They don’t usually write about how many times they had that moment and still failed.
We all fail though, all the time. You’ve watched me on this blog try and fail and try and fail. Although I don’t know if fail is exactly the right word, yes I’ve had missteps and more than missteps but I’ve never actually given up.
I think giving up is a true failure and I’ve never done that.
My intention now is do do every day of this 60 day Barre Blend workout then start a new 30 day workout after that’s supposed to be much more high intensity while also incorporating flowing movement.
I’ve always been fairly bendy despite my size and I like workouts that accentuate that.
I’ve also upped my intermittent fasting from 16/8 to 18/6 to see if that will help too.
My best friend is getting married in August and I intend to look and feel great for it! Especially if I’ll be the one who has to deal with her mother lol.
If you’re still here, still reading this, thank you. It’s never easy to follow someone’s journey when they’re just starting out and seem to lack motivation and consistency and I know it seems like I do.
I know the person I wanna be and I know I’ll be her one day and no matter how long it takes me. I will get there.
If you’re struggling too it’s OK, it happens, just never give up. Even if it’s a thought in the back of your mind that eventually you’ll get there, keep that thought, focus on it, nourish it. Just don’t give up on yourself.
New Year, new me?
I know, I know, it’s cliche! If I had wanted a new me I’d have gotten one years ago. Well, you know what I mean.
Even though I started this blog in August with the best intentions I’ve still failed quite a bit. Although I must say it hasn’t held me back like I’ve let it in the past.
I am actually in a downward trend weight wise thanks to sticking as best I can with 16:8 fasting even if it’s very slow going.
Slow though is much better than none at all!
So here is my current weight which you can see is down from when I weighed myself in September.
Which is great! Even though I don’t feel like it my little constant steps are working. Which is something I need to remind myself of over and over whenever I feel like giving up.
I did slip up yesterday and ate some doritos and a caramel apple. Which obviously both contain dairy, which I always tell myself I will never do again. This time however I mean it, I’m leaving dairy in the past, I don’t even like it all that much I just don’t have great self control.
But! Dairy is my past, not focusing on my health is my past, spending money on nonsense is my past (that’s a whole other habit I need to break). These things are my past, I can make my future anything I want, and I want it to be healthier.
I want to play with my nephew without getting nervous I won’t have the energy. I want to always choose the stairs and not have to catch my breath after for a full 5 minutes like I did Wednesday last week. I just want to do what I want to do without my body holding me back.
I know this is all on me, my own choices and failures led me to being like this. You’d think all my life every time I’ve said enough is enough that it would actually work. It hasn’t and I know it’s because I get into it for a while 3 months at most then I lose interest.
It’s frustrating, how can I lose interest in my own health?
I don’t know, but I’m gonna try to not do that this year, I’ve already had this blog for more than 3 months which is a pretty good achievement.
Have you had enough of me babbling?
Me too.
Thank you for taking the time to read this, let’s all do better together.
Happy New Year
Oh the holidays!
Holidays no matter which ones you celebrate are always filled with food!
Well I tred my best but I didn’t really track what I ate, however, I don’t think I ate too much.
I did actually keep my intermitent fasting up, only eating between 12 pm and 8 pm. Which I am really happy with!
What I’m not happy with is that I ate a cupcake or two..
Why am I not happy about this?
I am severly lactose intolerant, and I try my best to avoid most dairy. Butter is my main enemy, chocolate and ice cream are not great, I can eat greek yogurt with no problem but that’s about it. Cheese isn’t an issue because I do not like cheese which generally freaks people out!
So I did end up quite sick, and if you’re thinking ‘well hey at least the calories didn’t stick!’ it definitely does not work that way no matter how much I want it to.
Every time I eat something like that I always regret it and I always say “Never Again” and I always do it again. Discipline is definitely something I lack, you would think that being sick would be a significant reason enough. Apparently not.
Maybe talking about it here would be a goood enough way to help keep me accountable and help me make better choices.
You have all been so wonderful and the support I got on my last post really moved me. I genuinely appreciate you all so much and I hope to keep improving along with you all.
Thank you!
Did you think I forgot about you?
Well, I definitely did not.
I had this blog in my head constantly, always thinking about how I’m not posting and I should be posting. How I fell off the path yet again, how could I do that if I started this whole blog to make sure I wouldn’t?
It happens, it happens a lot, and it happened to me.
The only thing that I can say is that it happens to other people as well so I’m not alone at least?
Although, that still doesn’t make it better.
I’ve tried again to institute a routine for myself again but that hasn’t included more exercise than 15 minutes of yoga each morning.
I know which workout I want to do but it is going to take time to get there and instead of beating myself up about it, I’m going to take it one step at a time, and get there.
The one thing I have been trying to stick to and doing pretty well is 16:8 fasting. It’s working fairly well for me and I’ve lost a bit of weight with it but I know it isn’t enough.
I haven’t forgotten you, and I don’t want to give up. I’m still here, I’m still trying to work towards a healthier me, I know I will have these setbacks, there will be times when I pause, but I won’t stop and I won’t give up.
Oh dear, this makes things harder…
It seems that I’ve sprained my ankle.
It feels about right, I set myself to something and something else sets me back.
I used to bow under and let these things stop me, I’d take it as a sign that I should just give up. Then I thought, these things are a challenge and I have to face them and over come them! Yet, I still bowed under and failed.
I’ve failed a bit at this challenge, doing it perfectly one day and failing miserably the next.
Now here I have the perfect excuse to not do anything, to give up again. Well, I’ve decided that I’m not gonna do either anymore.
One day at a time, that’s all I can do, it’s all any of us can do. I’m not gonna let a failure make me give up, one day of failure is better than that.
It’s always easier to say than to do, but I have to try. I’m tired of giving up.
Little Victories
Lots of people say that you should celebrate little victories. The idea behind it is definitely valid, but like everything it’s not always easy to do.
Any time I have a little victory like working out in the hotel gym after 8 hours on the road, all I can think of is how many times I didn’t do a workout.
I feel good while I’m doing it, I feel cool, like hey I’m pushing, I’m doing this thing, and it’s awesome!
That feeling doesn’t last long however. I soon begin to feel foolish, or like I’m trying to fool myself or the people I imagine watch me go into the workout room.
Who am I fooling? It’s not like I workout all the time, I go in spurts. I workout for two months then stop for a year. It’s just a trend, it won’t last, why are you trying, you know it’s not gonna work.
This is about the most negative I get with myself, I’m not generally a negative person but working out away from home just makes me feel like I’m pretending.
Imposter syndrome can be a part of having adhd, and nothing makes me feel like an imposter more than working out away from home. It’s truly a bizzare feeling, and I know it’s ridiculous and I need to not think about it. It’s just hard sometimes.
Even with this get fit journey, part of me feels like it’s only temporary. Will I look back at this in a year and think “damn if I had only kept going imagine what I would be like now” or will it finally be “wow I can’t believe how much I accomplished in a year!”
Today I drove 8 hours, stopped at 830, had dinner, and at 11pm did my burpees and 30 minutes on a treadmill.
I am going to celebrate that small victory.
Two Truths and a Lie.
Having accountability partners is supposed to help you stay on track.
It’s a good idea, friends and family there to help push you when you need it, make you stick to your routine whatever that may be.
The problem with that though, is that you can lie. Yup, I’m totally keeping to my schedule! Yup, I definitely did those burpees! I’m definitely not lying through my teeth…
Unfortunately, you really only hurt yourself that way. You know it too, as you do it, you know you’re lying, you feel that guilt but you still do it. It then becomes another habit you have to learn to break.
As you’re reading this you’re probably thinking, so what does this mean? Did she do that burpee challenge? Did she lie about it? What’s going on here???
Well dear reader I did start the burpee challenge, I started it and have two other friends doing it with me. We have a group where we tell each other once we’ve completed them.
It started pretty well, for just a few days but for some reason I felt so exhausted by just everything. Is it a good excuse? Nope. Did it feel like it at the time? Still no.
I labeled this two truths and a lie because I didn’t skip every day and lie each time. But I did do it once or twice because I just couldn’t make myself do it but I felt too ashamed to tell the truth. Even to such close friends!
I’m trying to pay it back now, do 50 a day until all my debt is paid. I’ve made more work for myself but that’s how it goes, you can’t really cheat yourself like that. Either your goals suffer or you suffer trying to make up for it.
So two truths and a lie.
1. I tried my hardest to make myself do my burpees even though I failed sometimes.
2. I can do a split.
3. I can introduce myself in 5 different languages.
So you decide, where’s the lie?
Better late than never?
Talk about cutting it close!
Today is day 1 of my 25 burpees a day challenge!
I realized it’s 11:30 at night but hey it’s still today!
I had to modify a bit, I’m still fairly out of shape so no jumping just stepping and reaching. It’s only day 1 though, I imagine by the end of this I’ll get pretty good. Maybe.
I can’t say that it was fun but I can say that I got it done.
Please don’t forget that this is for charity and if you’re able I would appreciate anything that you could give.
25 down 750 to go.
Rachel Finally Gets Fit 